Tips for Expectant and New Moms and Dads

We all want responsible, dependable professionals to care for our children, but finding a good nanny is not always an easy task. The process takes patience and a lot of research to find just the right person. You want to hire someone who truly enjoys taking care of children and is in the field for all the right reasons. 

The first step in the process of finding a nanny is to ask yourself a few key questions:

What would my ideal nanny be like? The type of nanny you hire will depend on your own situation. Do you work in or out of the house? Are you a stay-at-home mom?

Do you want a live-in or live-out nanny? Do you need a full-time nanny, someone that comes part-time every day, or someone that comes in a few times a week?

Do you want an older, mature person with a lot of experience, or would you prefer a younger, more energetic person? Make a list of traits and qualities to refer to when you start interviewing applicants or talking to nanny agencies. 

The interviewing process is a great opportunity to learn about the candidates and their appropriateness for the position you’re offering.  A well organized list of questions will give you insight into the candidate’s personality, philosophies and experience.

When should I start looking for a nanny? If you plan to take some time off from work after the baby is born, you don’t have to start looking for a nanny until after the baby arrives.  If you try to hire a nanny too far in advance, she may not hold the time slot open for you. If you plan to go back to work right away, start looking around your seventh month so you’ll have a nanny lined up before the baby is born. In either case be sure to leave yourself a time cushion because finding the perfect person for your family might take a while. There are a number of great ways to find a nanny:

• Use word of mouth: Have friends and family ask around about nannies that  might be available. Sometimes a friend has a nanny whom she or he is ready to let go of because the children are older and will be in school most of the time. Sometimes a mother or father decides not to work anymore, to stay home and take care of the kids. This is the ideal way to find a nanny because you’re familiar with the family she’s worked for and you know her references will be reliable.
• Advertise in mothers’ and twins’ club newsletters and the clubs online forums: Placing an ad in a local newsletter will help you find someone qualified. And nannies looking for work by advertising in these newsletters will most likely have references from various members in the club.
• Go to online Web sites such as www.4nannies.com and www.nannynetwork.com. They offer some of the same services as nanny-placement agencies, and at a much lower cost.
• Post an ad at a local college: Many students are looking for nanny positions to help pay their way through school.
• Post an ad at local churches or synagogues: This is a good route if you’re looking for someone part time and inexpensive. You may find a grandma-type who would love to spend time with your children while making a little extra money.
• Call a local job-resource center: They may have a list of people seeking nanny positions, or be able to refer you to another agency.
  
• Call the local nanny-placement agencies in your area: The agencies will do the searching and some of the screening for you. They will do their best to find candidates that meet your needs. Most agencies also verify a nanny’s work experience, do a background check to see whether she has a criminal record, and check her driving record. The agency may also require blood and tuberculosis tests and proof of a recent physical checkup from job candidates to make sure that the nanny is in good health. The one drawback about finding a nanny through an agency is that you have to pay a hefty fee.  However, if that’s the only way you can find a person you trust with your children, it may be well worth the cost.
• Place an ad in the newspaper: Consider this a last resort, as you’ll probably get lots of calls, and screening will be difficult. Instead of answering the phone each time it rings, put an outgoing message on your answering machine asking potential candidates to leave their name, phone number, and the names and phone numbers of their references. That way you can check references before deciding whom you want to interview.

                                                            Interviewing A Nanny

The prospect of inviting a stranger into your home to care for your child, your most precious gift, can be overwhelming. There are many questions you need to ask to find safe, quality care for your child. It makes sense to find out as much as possible about a prospective nanny well before the first day of employment.

First, check references. Ask each nanny you’re considering for a list of past and present references. Be sure to call and talk to each person on the list. Ask former employers specific questions. Don’t ask vague questions like whether or not they liked the nanny. Instead, ask for details such as what exactly they liked about her, and what they disliked. Also ask them to describe her strengths and weaknesses.

While you’re interviewing the nanny, communicate your needs and expectations. You’ll want her beliefs about child rearing to align with yours so your children won’t be confused by different rules and routines. Offer her scenarios and see how she responds. For instance, ask her, “What would you do if the baby wouldn’t stop crying or wouldn’t go to sleep?” “How would you handle a dispute between two siblings?” “What form of discipline do you believe in?” Above all, look for common sense; you want someone who can think quickly, clearly, and rationally when handling any situation that arises.
    
Talk about salary and benefits. Map out an accurate work schedule. Discuss thoroughly each household task required and its frequency, (cleaning, emptying the dishwasher, cooking, laundry, etc). Discuss the priority of tasks in relation to the amount of time to be spent with the children. Work on establishing household rules and boundaries everyone can respect. Make it clear that any ill feelings or disputes on either side should be brought out in the open and discussed before problems get out of hand and things become uncomfortable for both parties. If she will be driving your child, ask for a copy of her driving record.

After you have hired the perfect nanny, have her start working well in advance of when you go back to work. Ease her in slowly. Teach her the routine you want her to follow. After a few days, let her take over as if you weren’t there. Observe how she handles herself and the children throughout the day. If everything goes well and you are satisfied with your choice, you can go back to work feeling that your children are in good hands. If for some reason you’re not happy with the nanny, don’t hesitate to let her go and find another: Your children’s welfare is the most important thing.

                                                            Nanny Interview Questions

Personal Background

• How long have you been in the area?
• What are your goals for the future?
• What do you like to do in your spare time?
• What are your strengths and weaknesses?
• Tell me a little bit about your family?
• Is there anything else you would like to share with me at this time?

Experience

• Why did you become a nanny?
• How long have you been a nanny?
• What do you like about being a nanny?
• Where have you worked before?
• What is the longest time you’ve spent with a family?
• What is the age range of the children you’ve cared for?
• What did you like most about your last position? What did you like least?
• Why did you leave your last position?
• Tell me about your relationship with your last employer?
• What are some of the rules you’ve followed in other households that you think work well?
• What sorts of rules don’t work for you?
• Is there anything in particular that makes it difficult for you to work with certain parents or children?

 Education

• Do you have any formal early childhood development education or childcare training?
• What is your education or training in regards to this type of work?
• Do you have CPR and children’s first-aid training? May I see your certification card? (If it isn’t current, ask her to get recertified. If she can’t take the class on her own, you may offer to send her and pick up the expense.)

Logistics

• Are you looking for a live-in or live-out position?
• Do you have any health problems that might interfere with your job?
• What hours are you looking for?
• When can you start working?
• Do you drive? Do you have a current driver’s license?
• How will you get to work? Do you have your own car, or will you be taking public transportation?
• Are you willing to do any light housework such as laundry, dishes, or straightening up while the baby is sleeping?
• Are you comfortable cooking meals for the household or would you prefer just cooking for the children?
• Are you comfortable running errands?
• Do you have car insurance?
• Are you comfortable working around pets?
• Can you work evenings or weekends?
• Will you be available to travel with our family for weekends/vacations?
• What is your salary range and when and how do you like to be paid?

Rules and Beliefs – Please specify your feelings about:

• Smoking
• Drinking
• Use of telephone
• Food (What would you like us to have for you to eat and drink?
• Television

 Approach to Child Rearing – Newborns and Infants

• What were your responsibilities in your last position?
• How would you pacify a baby if she woke up before it was time to eat?
• Do you believe in picking a baby up every time he cries, or do you let him cry it out?
• What method do you use to get a baby to sleep?
• How would you console a crying baby?

 Approach to Child Rearing – Toddlers and Older Children

• In your opinion, what is the most important thing to be aware of while taking care of my children? (The safety of the children should be included in her answer. This issue applies to children of all ages.)
• How would you keep my child entertained throughout the day?
• What would you do if my child threw a tantrum?
• (If you have more than one child) How would you handle a disagreement between two of my children?
• If my child needed to be disciplined, what method would you use? (If she states any form of discipline that doesn’t fit in with your beliefs, she’s out of there.)
• How would you reward a child for positive behavior?
• What might a typical day with my child be like?

How Would You Handle These Emergency Situations?

• Have you ever been confronted with an emergency situation at work? If so, how did you respond?
• What would you do if my child became sick or hurt?
• If a baby in your care spit up and stared choking what would you do?
• When and how do you use a bulb syringe?

Your Opinion of the Candidate

• Was she pleasant?
• Did she answer all your questions to your satisfaction?
• Did she seem comfortable with the children?
• Did the children seem to like her?
• While you are away from the house, will you feel comfortable knowing your children are at home with her?

How To Find and Interview A Pediatrician
By Elaine Farber

Choosing the right pediatrician is one of the most important decisions you make for your child. You want to find a pediatrician in a practice that makes you feel confident and comfortable.

Your pediatrician should also be warm, compassionate, and open to your thoughts and feelings, and you should share similar views on child rearing. If you know the sex of your child you might want to consider choosing a pediatrician of the same gender. When children become teenagers, they often feel more comfortable with a doctor of the same sex. Another thing to think about is the age of the doctor. If you choose an older doctor, ask whether retirement is in the near future and, if so, who will take over the practice. Choose the right pediatrician, and he/she might be able to treat your child from birth through adolescence.

It’s a good idea to begin your search for a pediatrician during your sixth month of pregnancy. This will give you plenty of time to decide on the right pediatrician before your baby is born. Compile a list of candidates by asking friends, relatives, coworkers, neighbors, and your obstetrician for recommendations.

After you’ve compiled your list of candidates set up appointments with several pediatricians. Different doctors have different approaches to child rearing. You want to make sure you select the one that best suits your family’s needs. Arrange to meet pediatricians individually and in person. If possible, both parents should attend the first meeting. Don’t interview pediatricians over the phone. Only a face-to-face meeting will let you know whether a pediatrician has the type of personality and philosophy about child rearing that you are seeking. It is very important to feel comfortable with the pediatrician you choose.

When interviewing a prospective pediatrician never feel afraid or embarrassed to ask questions. Remember; you child is your most precious gift.

Here are some specific questions you will want to ask:

• How long have you been in practice?
• Do you have any subspecialties?
• What are your office hours?
• How can I reach you in an emergency?
• If you can’t be reached in an emergency, what procedure should I follow?
• Is there an after-hours clinic and, if so, when is it open?
• What are your feelings regarding:
  • breastfeeding
  • bottle feeding
  • starting solid foods
  • circumcision
  • getting baby to sleep
  • vitamins
  • immunizations
  • taking baby out in public, traveling with baby.
  • What child-care books do you recommend?

In addition to talking with the pediatrician, you’ll want to ask the doctor’s staff some questions. When you make your appointment, be sure to ask whether there will be a staff member available to answer questions.

Here are a few pertinent questions to ask the staff.

• How does the office handle phone inquiries?
• Is there an advice nurse available to answer questions?
• Is there a 24-hour answering service that will connect to a doctor?
• How far in advance do I have to schedule appointments?
• If my child is sick, can I get an appointment that same day?
• How often are well-baby visits?
• Do newborns and well children have to wait in the same waiting room with sick children?
• When we arrive for our appointment, what is the typical waiting time before we see the doctor?
• What happens if we miss a scheduled visit?

After you’ve interviewed both the pediatrician and the staff ask yourself a few questions.

• Do you and this pediatrician share similar views on topics such as breastfeeding, circumcision, working mothers, day care, and so on?
• If not, is the pediatrician open to different opinions or other approaches?
• Does the pediatrician seem to be up on the latest medical advances?
• Did the doctor welcome questions and take the time to address your concerns?
• Did the pediatrician and office staff treat you courteously or curtly?
• Is the office conveniently located?
• Is there ample parking?
• Did the waiting room and the examination rooms have toys and books?
• Was everything clean?

If you were happy with the interview and satisfied with the answers to the questions you’ve asked yourself, you’ve probably found the right pediatrician for your family.

What to Look for When Purchasing a Mobile

By Elaine Farber

Newborns spend most of the time in their crib. Babies need some stimulation during the day, and mobiles are their first form of entertainment.  Soothing music and soft glowing lights are ideal for calming baby in her crib at night. Between six and eight weeks of age babies are ready for a mobile.  A mobile offers baby a close-up view of bright objects and friendly creatures that move to the sound of soothing music and dancing lights. A battery-operated mobile will run as long as you like; there’s no winding to be bothered with every two minutes. A remote control mobile means that mom or dad can stop or start the mobile’s motion with the click of a button.  When you get tired of the music, simply push the button or use the remote control to turn it off. Some mobiles can even be activated by your baby’s own voice.  When you’re purchasing a mobile for your child’s crib consider colors and dimensionality. Hold the mobile up for inspection. Get underneath the mobile and look at it from the baby’s point of view. Two-dimensional mobiles can be harder for babies to see than mobiles with three-dimensional qualities. With many flat, two-dimensional mobiles the objects seem to disappear when you look from the baby’s angle. The best mobiles are three-dimensional, in which case the toys stand out. Many mobiles also play music. Listening to the tunes available will help you decide between similar mobiles.

If you are having a single baby one mobile is all you need.  If you are having twins and are going to sleep them in the same crib you still only need one mobile.  If you are going to sleep your twins in separate cribs it would be nice to have a mobile for each baby.  A little tip: If baby is going to watch his mobile after eating, place him on a Boppy pillow in the crib.  A baby placed flat on his back after eating is likely to spit up.  Elevating baby on a Boppy will make him feel more comfortable and help prevent spitting up.  Never leave baby unattended on a Boppy pillow.

Mobiles attach to and hang above the crib. Never hang the mobile directly over the baby. Make sure the mobile is securely attached to the crib, is high enough the baby can’t reach, and that it is removed from the baby’s crib when she reaches six months old, or as soon as she begins to sit up. If your mobile has strings make sure they are out of your baby’s reach. Removing the mobile doesn’t mean you have to put it away. Many mobiles are designed so you can mount them on the wall for baby’s enjoyment.

Listed are some recommended crib mobiles that offer music, lights and some have a remote control:

Friendly Firsts Smart Response Musical Mobile by Fisher Price
www.amazon.com         www.fisherprice.com
Ocean Wonders Mobile with Remote Control by Fisher Price
www.amazon.com         www.fisherprice.com
Tiny Love Symphony-in-Motion Remote Mobile
www.amazon.com        www.tinylove.com 

Some babies need a distraction when having their diaper changed or when they are getting dressed.  Keep your baby entertained and happy while he’s on the changing table with a mobile that attaches right to the changing table.

Suggested changing table mobile:

Changing Table Flutter Bug by Infantino
www.amazon.com        www.infntino.com

A suction cup, wall-mounted mobile can be hung anywhere in the house to entertain your baby.  Hang it over the crib for play time, hang it over the changing table to distract baby while you’re changing diapers or getting baby dressed.  As your baby grows you can hang the mobile in any room, out of reach, so baby can still enjoy it.

Recommended wall mounted mobile:

Caterpillar Mobile by Sassy
www.amazon.com         www.target.com